Alone
by Ninjastarzz
Summary: (KIM X DUNCAN PAIRING) (YOGSCAST FANFICTION) Nano takes a run in the forest at night when she can no longer stand the tension between herself and her favorite blond. "In the end it wasn't like she expected. She felt no satisfaction or pleasure from watching him struggle like everyone else, only guilt"


Nano's well aware that what she is doing is crossing lines, so many that she's running out of appendages to count the wrongs on, the anxiousness twists awkwardly in her stomach as she muses on her string of misadventures of recent times, crossing into enemy territory. _**Again. **_but his voice just won't leave her alone, "Find your own life to control" and she knows that if she doesn't witness _anyone _give anyone human contact soon, engage in conversation or smile than she's going to go insane. When had she become so closed off?

Her mutters are resigned and weighted,

"I shouldn't be doing this, I _really _shouldn't be doing this-"

"Awe come on Ryth! Why you gotta be such a spoilsport?" The high pitched giggle rung out in the silence of the forest border and she froze. Trying to appear inconspicuous, dropping low to the dirty forest floor she shuffled along in the most dignified way she could manage, before standing up against a tree.

She could feel the knarled wood, knotted beneath her fingertips and she struggled not to sneeze as the smell of rot forced its way through her senses, so strong she could practically taste it, her eyes already raw from crying earlier burning. Owls called somewhere in the distance, judging by the night sky it certainly wasn't early, but she couldn't bring herself to turn around and head home. This whole thing was ridiculous, she knew that, but going home without even seeing what she came to see would be such a waste of time. A voice in the back of her mind, one of the voices she chose to ignore most of the time muttered that it was even more ridiculous that she hadn't even told Lalnah where she was going. Not that she was doing anything _wrong_, at least she didn't mean them any _harm_ but she wasn't sure how he would react to this quirk of hers, her need to observe other people. She normally would just speak to him when she feels lonely, but of course she remembers with a bitter sigh and slight betrayal,

Lalnah's busy at the moment.

So ignoring the warning signs in her mind telling to go back home she reached out in the underbrush, and pushing quietly as she could parted the front hanging bunch of leaves, creating an opening to look through. Her eyes, one swirling purple and one rich chocolate narrowed as she took in the scene in front of her. She knows she can't appear and speak to them, she's not foolish enough to think it wouldn't cause problems when they found out she was associated with her blond scientist and Lalnah, would certainly not be pleased to find out she had considered speaking to his rival, yet a part of her that is hurt by his constant ignoring of her and sick of their arguments dares her to throw herself into the danger. Have a good time, let **him **worry about **her** for once. God knows she spent enough time worrying about him and his stupid experiments and his lack of concern for personal hygiene or simply looking after himself.!

She knows she won't, she's not brave enough. But still, she can at least pretend.

A women was tinkering with some machine, a wrench in hand and a cheeky grin on her face. Her hair was a burning red, though some brown hair that almost seemed burnt was visible amongst her natural hair colour, held back in a pony tail. She was kneeling on cobblestone floor, her skin set aglow by the backlight of Burning torches as she glared at the man named 'Rythian' next to her. Nano had never seen him before, but she recognised him instantly, he was well known in the community.

Nano noted in a place at the back of her mind to be filed away that he was the red women's opposite in almost every way. The women who she assumed based on others accounts was 'Zoey' was bright and practically _oozed _ of eccentricity with her robotic flashing hand and easy cheerfulness, while 'Rythian' was incredibly skinny compared to her curviness, with a messy mop of dark brown hair that somehow despite obviously not being well cared for still looked stylish, at the very front a singular thick curl fell across his forehead, a streak of almost bleach blond that contrasted crisply against the rich tone of his natural hair. Or maybe that curl was naturally that colour?

His skin was also dark and his piercing eyes that seemed to regularly switch between purple like her left and ice blue were set solely on his female companion in a glare that was incredibly intense, almost as though he was trying to erase her from his very presence.

To be blunt the women was adorable,

Whereas he was downright _intimidating_.

Suddenly he moved towards her leaning down to look into the woman's eyes, blue like his, but much kinder and sighed.

"Am not" He huffed indignantly crossing his arms and pouting.

"Are too~" Zoey sang looking up at him.

"Please, you can handle it yourself, I'll just get in your way."

Zoey dropped her mouth in mock horror, "Golly Gosh!" She said dramatically, bringing her left hand up to her mouth, "Did you just admit that your anything other than _perfect_?!"

Chuckling, he sat down beside her, discarding a bag and cloak delicately.

"Shhhhhhhh" he hushed bringing a finger to his lips, "Don't tell the others"

Zoey frowned, scrunching up her nose and peered at him curiously as she tilted her head to the side. "Why are you being so playful? Shouldn't you be scolding me?"

Rythian shrugged with a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips, "Am I not often kind to you Zoey?"

Zoey looked at him as if he'd grown a second head and said with the straightest expression Nano had ever seen, "No you're not, you think I'm crazy" Simple words, as if it was a fact.

His charming smile disappeared and he visibly flinched. Apparently struggling for how to respond, but his eyes said enough. He was hurt, and guilt shined clearly through them.

"I apologise," He said, avoiding Zoeys gaze "I do not mean to be so… callous Zo, but that's just my nature. I have been alone for so long I fear I don't know how to communicate without being rude anymore"

_**Jeez, **_she thought, her heart clenching in her chest. _**I fear I don't know how to communicate? Who speaks like that?**_

Giggling, Zoey reached for his hand and gave it a squeeze. " I have no idea what you just said, but I think I heard a sorry in there somewhere. So my angelical self is gonna let it go, Fishton forgives you too!"

Nano had to pinch her stomach to stop herself from laughing and simultaneously bursting into tears, oh how she _wished_ they could be friends. Zoey was her type of person to a tee.

Pulling Zoey up Rythian sighed, looking down at his feet before kissing her on the cheek telling her it was time to go back inside, Nano knew their base was just behind them camouflaged by yet more foliage, as they were standing in a clearing.

The two disappeared from Nano's view hand in hand into the distance and she tried to hold back a sob and power through the sudden wave of loneliness that was overcoming her.

She stood up, uncaring about how loud she was now the people she has been hiding from were gone leaving her alone again, and as she turned around heading back in the direction she had come from, back towards home. She tried to tell herself to grow the fuck up and snap out of it but it wasn't working.

It was all the couples fault she decided knowing she was lying to herself. The way Rythian had so easily apologised, (despite it being incredibly awkward) had struck a chord in Nano. The way he looked at Zoey, as if she was all that mattered made her want to scream. How could someone as obviously awkward as Rythian make his feelings clear when Lalnah couldn't even look her in the eye? Couldn't even talk to her unless they were arguing? She had no idea where she stood with him.

She didn't want to dictate his every move like he claimed, or be the centre of his universe, she merely wanted a little attention, for him to go to bed and _sleep___instead of slaving away over his science gimmicks, trying to find a way to remove the flux from her body when he thought she wasn't looking. That was kind of him, to want to help her get better, the flux scared her and she wouldn't mind it being taken away so she could be normal again, but that didn't mean she wanted him to **kill** himself in the process!

She carried on, pushing branches out of her way as she went. Falling over and over again but each time she stood up and carried on, she had to go home. Soon she was a crying mess, scratches everywhere, twigs and leaves tangled in her usually sleek black hair and Notch knows what under her fingernails.

She walked for what felt like hours and soon it became apparent she was lost.

"For fucks sake…"

Squeezing her arms shivering and whimpering she settled at the bottom of another tree and curled into tight ball, resting her chin on her knees.

"Why do I even bother anymore?" She said.

_**Snap. **_She looked up. _**Crack. **_She hauled herself up, standing attentively, she felt everything still inside her as she listened to the best of her ability. It was quiet, too quiet.

_**What happened to all the animals? **_She thought.

The noises of twigs snapping continued and she began to panic as she realised someone or something was coming towards her. She scrabbled along the floor looking for anything that could help her, a rock or a stick. There was nothing.

"Hello?"

Her mind went completely blank, she stupidly forgot that she had her ruby tools on her, including a sword. Instead of swinging when she felt someone grab her wrist from behind she let out a desperate scream that just wouldn't stop.

"Shut up!" A white gloved hand, a man's hand, covered her mouth, "Someone will hear you!"

Bucking against him she pulled away as hard as she could and bit down on his hand, _hard_.

"FUCKING HELL NANO!" He screamed, clutching his bitten hand awkwardly. In the silence, only now did she think to look at her attacker.

"Lalnah?" She asked.

He looked a mess, his thick blond hair was in a disarray as if he had been running his hands through it, he was shaking from the cold and his usually pale face was flushed a dark red, but it was definitely Lalnah.

"Who else would it be?!" He snapped, frowning at her.

She looked down, away from his eyes. "Nano?"

Silence stretched out again and Duncan reached out to her, but then he pulled his hand back with an expression she couldn't indentify.

Then she burst into to tears. Not quiet or muffled like the previous meltdown. These were loud wailing cries that broke and rasped before started again. Tears streaked down her face

and she doubled over and dropped to her knees. The harder she fought to stop the harder they came, she could feel the heat of burning shame pool in the pit of her stomach at the thought of letting Duncan see her in such a pathetic state.

She expected him to leave, or at the least stay where he was, ignore her like he usually did. Instead she heard his steps as he came closer dropping to his knees beside her and pulled her shaking body towards him, draping his prized lab coat over her shoulders.

He pulled his gloves off throwing them carelessly behind his shoulders and ran his warm hands up and down her freezing arms. "You're so cold" he muttered, "Why didn't you wear something warmer?" She didn't answer so he began to pick the leaves and twigs out of her hair. When he finished and she was looking a little neater and less like she'd been hit by seven trucks he pulled away and balanced his forehead against her own. It was then for the first time in a while, she realised, that Lalnah had removed his lab goggles and she could actually see his eyes for once, staring into her own.

His eyes were worried.

"Well?" He said raising an eyebrow.

"Well what?" Nano snapped.

He narrowed his eyes, "Why are you out here?"

She grabbed a fistful of his usually pristine under shirt now covered in mud, contemplating whether to strangle him or hide her face against it.

"Nano?"

"Why are you bothering to speak to me" she muttered breathing in the sweet scent that always seemed to follow in his wake. _**Probably something to do with the chemicals he's always handling **_ She mused to herself even as she spoke.

"Thought you were supposed to be _busy _"

He scowled and refused to meet her eyes, "Don't start Nano"

She untangled herself from him, " whatever Lalnah, it's always the same with you. You won't even speak to me, haven't even raised your eyes to _look_ at me in over a week and suddenly you want to know where I am, I thought you wanted me to get a life of my own?"

He opened his mouth to answer her but she continued.

"But of _course _ when you suddenly want my company I should come running back, it doesn't matter thatI wanted to go for a walk, that's so treacherous of me isn't it? Walking, _for shame!_"

"Nano!"

"How dare I walk! Walking should be _illegal-"_

"**What the fuck is wrong with you?**" He snarled.

She comes to a sudden stop, whatever words she had on the tip of her tongue now dying before she can speak them. They had argued allot recently but he had _never _ once swore or raised his voice at her. It was what started most of the fights to be honest, the fact that she was the only one who seemed to actually care.

"I don't-"

"NO!" He growled, "Don't you **dare **rationalise this, do you not realise how **dangerous** it is out here!?"

"But-"

"No Nano, no buts! What would have happened if I hadn't found you huh? You could have frozen to death, or _worse_!"

He breathes heavily through his nose, probably counting to ten. His normally bright eyes are far too light, making him look delirious and more than slightly off his rocker, then she notices the moisture pooling in the corners of his eyes and her heart clenches.

"Lalnah are you_ crying_?!" She says, barely able to believe it. Not him, he never showed any emotion to her, maybe Xpheos and Honeydew but never her. He couldn't be crying, it simply wasn't possible.

But he was, right in front of her. It can't be denied.

She stares at him utterly surprised waiting for something, anything but he won't look at her as the tears flow down his cheeks like hers had only a few minutes before. He instead chooses to glare at the dirty forest floor as if it had suddenly become the most interesting thing in existence, letting his long fringe cover his face.

"I thought…" He rasped pausing for a moment as his voice cracked, "I thought you were gone, that I'd never see you again"

If possible he withdrew even further, guilt hit her full force as she realised that this was possibly one of the most selfish things she'd ever done. Arguing or not, she never should have put him through this.

_**I'm sorry Lalnah, I'm so so sorry.**_

She reached out for him again in an effort to placate him but he shrunk away from her fingertips still avoiding her gaze. When the argument that had caused all this first occurred she had been so angry, she had imagined what it would be like if she could actually hurt him the way he had the power to hurt her. To see him deal with human emotion, so just _once_ she could find out if she was wasting her time waiting on him. So just _once _she could have the satisfaction of watching him struggle like everyone else instead of breezing through ever problem unaffected because he simply didn't care. Now looking at him she didn't feel anything but a painful mixture of guilt and disbelief.

_**How could I do this to someone I love?**_

Making her mind up she lifted up his chin so they were face to face, "I'm sorry Lalnah, your right, I was stupid to do this. I just wanted to chill a bit I didn't even think about telling you where I was going, I'm so sorry"

He calmed a bit at this and lifting his left hand moved her own so she was cupping the side of his face.

"No, I'm sorry" he whispered, "I'm sorry I made you want to leave"

She stuttered at the physical contact but when she spoke her voice was clear with confidence.

"I'm not leaving Lalnah"

He didn't look convinced, "I understand Nano really- I-I know I'm not… _normal_, everyone leaves."

She shook her head with a tentative smile, "Well I'm different, you're stuck with me"

His eyes were shining with hope and she felt her smile grow wider and a blush spread across her cheeks.

"Promise?"

She nodded, "I promise"

The next hour and a half spent making their way back home was certainly not smooth sailing. They were lost for what felt like forever and both exhausted, but they had made up. The fact that he had held her hand tightly all the way home as if he feared she would disappear if he let go didn't hurt either.

When they finally opened the door to their facility and practically fell inside it was nearly midnight and to Nano's delight, they went to bed _together_ for the first time as he sighed "Just this once"

In the morning he acted the same as he always did,

but from that day forward they never slept alone.


End file.
